Hookup Culture | Going Beyond Limits and Shame To Have Satisfaction

Last Update 12.09.2019

What Is Hookup Culture?

With the development of the innumerable number of the dating and hookup websites and apps, a new term has been coined, the hookup culture. On the one hand, it seems more or less clear what it is, while on the other hand, the term needs to get paid attention to the bigger extent. So, being a professional participant of the hookup culture, HookupGeek is going to provide you, our beloved readers, with the hookup culture definition, since it would serve as a basis for the sexual hookup culture a review by HookupGeek.

In this current hookup culture article by HookupGeek, our essential purpose is to make a great contribution to the better understanding the hookup culture, as this aspect is of importance. Some of the reputable investigators of hookup and hookup culture state that “a hookup is brief—it can last from a few minutes to as long as several hours over a single night. The hookup may be a drunken makeout on the dance floor or involve sleeping over and taking the so-called “walk of shame” in the morning.”

Hence, hookup culture is the cultural and social phenomenon, which is aimed at providing its participants with the opportunities of having the casual sex, one-night stand instances, and sex, which would be referred to as no strings attached. In other words, the hookup culture is known to incorporate the numerous terms, which are related not only to sex as such but to the external factors, including the numerous apps and sites for hookup online, real meetings with the persons, who wish one-time sex with no obligations or any serious consequences.

The hookup culture is known to be an opposite to the asexual culture; however, they both create the dichotomy of the sexual behavior evident in the modern times. Thus, both hookupers and asexuals are the result of one general trend of infantilization and neuroticism of youth including the hookup culture on college campuses. The ability to maintain stable close and/or serious relationships is a property of a mature personality and a trend of a particular time. And immature, infantile personalities avoid them (at least long-term ones), because they are unable to take responsibility. However, currently, as it was already mentioned, with the spread of the hookup culture, there is no need in relations, as one can always have diversity in the choice of free sex and partners to have it.

So, in order to define hookup culture, it is paramount to consider some of the psychological motifs the users of the hookup apps and websites tend to follow. Among the psychological mechanisms that generate hookupers, two options can be distinguished.

The first is the infantile hedonistic option. In this case, students have not yet “grown up” to true love. For them, sex without love is a manifestation of a narcissistic inability to love someone other than themselves;
The second is a post-traumatic option. At a tender age, they experienced a painful crisis of breaking up relationships or unrequited love, overcoming love addiction. And, in order to avoid its repetition, they try not to fall in love. At the same time, carriers of stereotypes of such behavior actively promote their lifestyle as the only right one, act as “social missionaries”.

The only hope is that in the future they will “grow” to psychological maturity and will be able to create relationships and families. If, of course, they want it.

Hookup Culture Statistics

In compliance with some of the researchers and responses of our readers, HookupGeek has obtained the following stats about the hookup culture of straight persons,

81% of respondents engaged in some form of hookup behavior
58% were engaged in sexual touching above the waist
53% were engaged in sexual touching below the waist
36% of respondents performed oral sex
35% of respondents received oral sex
34% engaged in sexual intercourse in the context of a hookup

We would also like to provide some more stats on the hookup culture in the USA. Let’s see how this all is related to men,

25% of men claim that they would prefer hookup to serious ties
50% of men believe that they’d prefer having sex somewhere out of the house
70% of men do not prefer giving oral sex to a woman
15% of men would participate in threesome experiences for the first time
50% of male respondents claim that their first hookup case was when they were 18–21 y.o.
25% of male respondents state that they were eager to a sugar daddy when hooking up for the first time

What is the specific attitude of women towards the hookup?

35% of women claim that they would prefer hookup to serious ties
20% of women believe that they’d prefer having sex somewhere out of the house
45% of women would agree to give oral sex to a man
15% of women would agree on having threesome experiences when the first dating
30% of male respondents claim that their first hookup case was when they were 18–21 y.o.
45% of female respondents state that they were looking a sugar daddy when hooking up for the first time

American Hookup: The New Culture Of Sex On Campus

As a rule, when it comes to the college hookup culture, it is evident this particular age group is greatly exposed to it, as the physiological and social prerequisites tend to be quite favorable. However, when one touches upon the college hookup culture, the role of men and women in this phenomenon is frequently considered as different.

It is unlikely that anyone, even living on a small remote island in the Pacific Ocean, may be shocked by the assertion that college students sometimes share love and sex. So why, having survived the sexual revolution, we perceive the so-called “hookup culture” as something new? As a matter of fact, there are several aspects to come across as for the hookup culture college format.

It is mainly not about sex in general, but about young female college students who actively and consciously choose sex without love. They coldly and pragmatically choose partners for one night, without any secret hopes for a romantic relationship and dreams of a joint future.
These are girls who everywhere are accompanied by a restrained grumbling disapproval—whether it is the audience of numerous talk shows, or grandmothers who conduct vigilant observation on the benches at each entrance.
Moreover, every time a female college student’s desire to get acquainted with unambiguous and clear goals for everyone causes sincere bewilderment.

Hookup culture is often perceived as a phenomenon in which a woman is assigned the role of a victim (she, of course, cannot engage in sexual relations without setting up castles in the most naïve and idiotic manner about happy marriage and eternal love). There is another option—a strong woman, from a young age focused on building a career and not wanting to spend time and energy on a serious relationship.

All this may be true, but why then society does not want to comprehend that there is also the third option: young women choose casual sex, because they just like it, as in fact, there is nothing actually bad in titillation gained out of sex. Everything can depend on the moment, period in life, situation, evening, mood and many more individual characteristics of female life.

The current generation of young women is not the first to choose casual sex with men for whom they are not going to marry: someone goes for it for the thirst for adventure, someone is bored, someone wants to drown out the fear of death, someone gnaws longing and do not want to be alone on this particular night, but someone just turned up a sexually attractive object. There may be a million reasons. So why does the idea that a woman (no one has any questions about men) choose sex without romantic ambition still seems so unnatural?

Are the millennials so different? What are their peculiar distinctive features? As a matter of fact, yes, there are some differences. They are mainly based on the fact of the time when the representatives of this generation were born. By 2000s, all the sexual biases had been overcome, and mainly none of them had survived. So, being born in or after 2000, the persons did not have any idea that something could have been forbidden. Thus, they perceived their sexual freedom as something which has always existed. The people of earlier generations do perceive it in a different way: they know that hooking up was not that spread, that it was quite unethical, and so on.

Hookup Culture In College And College Hookup Culture Statistics

When it comes to the stats related to the college students and their vision of hookup culture, it is necessary to understand that all the data are mainly based on the age particularities and desire to have innumerable sexual experiments. So, this is what HookupGeek has found out about the hookup culture stats amongst the college students,

70% of the college students claim they had first hookup even before the first classes
45% of male college students used hookup principles to try something new
60% of female college students were drunk when they had casual sex in college
50% of all students believe that the most interesting was to have casual sex on campus
5% of female college students lost virginity because of the college hookup.

We have collected even some more stats about the culture of hookup among the college students,

50% of male college students do not carry on communication with the girls they successfully hooked up
20% of girls of college are ready to have the same partner for the casual sex for the second time
65% of college students (both male and female) would love to have sex with their profs
75% of college students do not use any protection when having first hookups
15% of college students would like to have their hookup outside the campus (in pubs, bars, and cinemas)
10% of college students would be eager to build any serious relations after they hooked up a particular person.

Millennials And Hookup Culture

Modern society—especially the young generation generally referred to as millennials—is very tolerant of sex without any commitment, or one-night stand sex, after which no one owes anything to anyone. But is it really so simple? In our society, sex without obligation is a normal phenomenon and suits both men and women.

In spite of the fact that casual sex within the framework of hookup culture today is a fairly common occurrence; however, the archaic attitudes that exist in our minds prevent us from fully relaxing and enjoying the process.

Well, is hookup culture different for the millenials and the persons, who were born some earlier?

The generation of women before the era of millenials who have been taught since childhood that honor should be taken care of from a young age end up in an ambiguous situation: on the one hand, sleeping with a man right away seems to be bad manners. On the other hand, this is how many ladies act, and do not consider this a problem.
In men, too, a mixture of feelings occurs. They really want the woman to immediately agree to sex, but at the same time very many representatives of the stronger sex have the idea that since the lady was able to quickly get sex, it means that she is kind of frivolous and is able to go to bed with everyone. Accordingly, will there be many guys who would seriously consider such a woman?
If we speak about the generation of millenials, the first goal of a man when he sees a woman he likes is to drag her into bed. At the same time, this man does not build any plans for further life together with a lady. But it happens that a girl “catches” after sex, and, the partner, it seems, is not against continuing the relationship with her, but the thought that the young lady has agreed too close to her in the brain interferes. In the future, this may adversely affect the relationship. For example, partners will not trust each other, be jealous, and so on.

As a result, within the hookup culture of the millenials there are some rules to follow in order to have success in hookup,

A woman should never tell a man that she does not need anything from him except sex. Having voiced her thought, the lady simply signs that she is a whore because in the understanding of a man her words are abnormal.
If a woman really wants a particular man for one night, you need to try to seduce him, only without vulgarity.
The ideal option goes with the help of female tricks, looks, smiles, sighs and so on, turn the situation so that the man himself wants to spend the night with a seductress and went on the offensive.
However, if a woman is liked, the partner can follow her lead and agree to continue the novel. But here the casual sex relationship is already ending. At the same time, the paradox is that, despite the established love relationship, both partners remained at the initial stage of the unobtrusive relationship. The man with this interpretation, which was voiced at the first date, closes like a shield. The woman throws this shield away.

Of course, hookup and casual sex relationships at first glance greatly facilitate life, as the majority of millenials have a conviction. Flirtation, SMS correspondence, friendly sex—yeah, all this allows us to get rid of the stress associated with expectations, which means we feel more relaxed. It is tempting to gain complete control over the sphere of our life where, it would seem, we are most vulnerable—the sphere of intimacy. By abandoning formalities, we can allow ourselves to be more detached and, ultimately, maintain our independence.

But this style of behavior is easy to get used to, and the spread of hookup culture among the millennials is a great proof. The farther, the more difficult it is for us to behave in a situation where we want to make an unambiguous choice, decide whether the next gentleman will get a pass to the next level or will remain a passing memory.

The slightest inconvenience becomes the reason for parting. But! There will be no tears, because “we kinda agreed not to wait for anything more serious.” Hence,

The experience of being in a pair allows the millennials to realize the true value of communication, learn to listen to another, and master the art of compromise.
A new acquaintance is always a step to an unknown territory.
The millennials do not know what we are faced with, and therefore, each time we are forced to take risks.
In an effort to maintain the status quo at all costs, the millennials are depriving themselves of new sensations, and in the long run—the possibility of development, evolution.

As a result, the millennials have elaborated a list of behavior samples and principle within the hookup culture, which are much different from the ones, which characterized the hookup culture as such when it was born back in the 1990s.

In addition to this, there are some cool locations for hookup which are widely used by the generation of millennials, and they are comprised of the following ones,

hookup pubs
hookup bars
clubbing
cinemas
speed dating events
parties (with drugs and alcohol)
campus

Each of these locations is nice and appealing; however, the greatest popularity is for the special hookup bars and pubs, where one can both have nice time, and… sex in a WC, say, if the fast experiences are meant.

The thing is that the millennials are not that fond of having the hookup turned into something serious. So, nowadays, there is a tendency not to get acquainted in a regular meaning of this word. As a rule, a man hooks up a girl, touches her, and saying nothing they can go out to have some sexual experiences. Thus, no one says their names, no one is interested in income, job, education, and any cultural values. As a result, the hookup culture of millennials can be said to be absolutely deprived of any cultural values, and this absence of cultural values within the hookup culture has successfully shaped it as a… layer of culture in general. As we already said, a paradox of hookup culture.

Stats On The Millennials’ Hookup Culture

The fact that the generation of millennials can be supposed to be one of the most frivolous as by the time when they had been born, the sexual revolution was over, and everyone could use its fruits. Thus, some of the millennials could really be born out of the hookup of their parents, and, thus, they have been engaged in the same hookup culture when they grew older. So, there are some nice stats about the way in which millennials perceive and participate in hookup culture,

80% of millennials would be happy to be constantly engaged in sexual experiments as a result of hookup
50% of millennials in general prefer using the best hookup sites and fuck sites and apps to hookup
15% of millennials would be eager to have some intricate experiences when using the cougar dating sites
35% of millennials have been engaged casual sexual experiments with the same-sex persons
25% of them have decided to carry on the experiments via using the gay dating sites and apps or lesbian dating sites and hookup apps
60% of millennials still prefer visiting hookup bars and pubs as an alternative to virtual space

Gay Hookup Culture

HookupGeek has devoted numerous insights to how the gay community develops and how the gay hookup apps and websites function, and we do really know that the LGBTQ+ community has its own approach to how hookup culture is to be built. Thus, we will expose everything in this section so that you would clearly understand the way, in which the gay hookup functions and how it is popular.

First and foremost, it is important to note that the gay hookup culture tends to have some important elements, which are not actually presented in the one of the straight guys. For instance,

gay hookup culture is comprised not only gay men;
homosexual women are also participants of the gay hookup culture;
bisexual men and women are the representatives of the gay hookup culture;
transgender people (both men and women); and
the straight men and women who would love have some sexual experiments are also the members of the gay hookup culture.

Thus, in order to understand in what way the hookup culture of gay people functions, it is paramount to bear in mind that it is comprised of the numerous categories of people. This kind of diversity greatly impacts the shape which the modern hookup culture of gay people possesses.

What are the key features and trends of the hookup culture among the gay people?

the priority of any relations between the gay men is focused on having casual sex instead of some real and serious cases;
lesbians are less devoted to hookup; however, this tendency is also evident among the lesbians who can be referred to as millennials;
gay men tend to be quite friendly and active when it comes to getting acquainted (as you remember, as we told you, in straight relations within the hookup culture, the women are more active nowadays);
lesbian girls are focused on less regular and frequent change of the sex partners than the gay men;
gay men prefer having sex in the most extreme situations, so the dating is not that spread within the gay hookup culture.

Hence, the shape of the gay hookup culture is even more frivolous than the straight people’s one.

What is more, it is necessary to draw some attention to the issue of how the straight women and men tend to try the homosexual relations,

statistically, the homosexual cases take part with the participation of either a straight man or a woman with the gay ones after having some alcohol consumed;
also, some homosexual experiences among the heterosexuals can be recorded under the impact of the drags and substances;
straight men are less actively engaged in having homosexual experiences than the women.

One of the most important questions here is why the straight persons try the gay sex? Oh, within gay hookup culture and hookup culture in general, there are some impacting tools and mechanisms,

the growth of tolerance to the LGBTQ+ community is one of the reasons, why the straight people tend to try it all;
curiosity is another reason, since the desire to have some newer experiences is quite a great thing to push to experiment;
impact of the mass media, wherein there are numerous references to the gay community;
presence of the homosexual friends, who promote an idea that love and sex are not to be based on the gender aspect;
diversity of the adult movies wherein the bisexual experiences are advertised and showed.

Thus, in fact, today, there are innumerable factors, which shape the gay hookup culture, and they are quite impacting. Hence, it is possible to assume that the gay hookup culture will be developing in the most rapid pace, and, thus, there will be more and more interesting facts about it!

Gay Hookup Culture Stats

Number of sex partners stats: gay men

50% of gay men tend to claim that they had more than 30 partners
45% of gay men say they had their first sex when they were under 18 y.o.
15% of gay men tried heterosexual and bisexual experiences
5% of gay men state that they would prefer having serious relations
1% of gay men would prefer being alone with no ties and sex

Number of sex partners stats: gay women

25% of gay women tend to claim that they had more than 30 partners
60% of gay women say they had their first sex when they were under 18 y.o.
50% of gay women tried heterosexual and bisexual experiences
50% of gay women state that they would prefer having serious relations
1% of gay men would prefer being alone with no ties and sex

Number of gay experiences among the straight men

35% of straight men consider a probability to have sex with another man
40% of straight men at least once had sex with another man
20% of straight men kissed with a man
5% of straight men would never try it out

Number of gay experiences among the straight women

25% of straight women consider a probability to have sex with another woman
30% of straight women at least once had sex with another woman
40% of straight women kissed with a woman
5% of straight women would never try it out

Conclusion

Yep. HookupGeek has showed you so many nice approaches to the hookup culture, which is currently o spread all over the USA. Well, now you can know that the hookup culture is not limited to the hookup locations like bars and pubs but also is comprised of the numerous ‘rules’ and tendencies. Of course, they are often different from a city to a city and from a particular age or social group to another one.

Also, we have showed you the numerous aspect of how men and women perceive the hookup culture and how they act when it comes to the casual sex and hookup. So, which of the following is one of the positive aspects of the hookup culture? In fact, we would not like to judge and analyze these aspects, since every person has their own vision, and lifestyle, so that it would be better to tolerate and respect this but not to judge at all. So, each of the aspects if the hookup culture of the modern times can be both positive and negative, as everything depends on the way how a particular member of society is eager to participate in it or not. What is more, the fact of hookup and its presence shape the essence of the culture of hookup as an inseparable part of the modern people’s lifestyle. Hence, hookup culture is a great layer of the culture in general, and it has so many aspects to consider!